masturdating...

Masturdating : The act of hanging out in public places such as the mall, the beach, movies etc on your own. Basically to go on a one-person date - that one person being yourself. Rather sad.

Well, today I masturdated. This was a very eye-opening deal of karma (if there's any such thing). The reason I say this is because I always laugh at other masturdaters when I'm at the movies with my loser friends. Honestly though, I think it's the thrill of getting to use the word more than meanness.
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On my way to the mall - just a walk away from our house - I was holding my bag in a very protective manner, what with the crime rate in this country and all. suddenly, this man was walking behind me and I very subtly got more protective of my bag - not something I would do in Durban. The guy walked pass me and said, "Ey, you scared, heh? you hold your bag tighter when I walk pass" with that accent. I replied, "No, I was holding it like this" which was so feeble I might as well have just laughed sheepishly.
What the man didn't know was that my mind wasn't on my bag as it was on my kidneys. Haha! See, I have a few peculiar "paranoias". I always get afraid of people walking behind me as I fear they might stab me in the kidney. I am always so convinced about this that I can't helping turning around regularly to ensure my kidneys are safe. No knife in hand? Sweet. I also tend to think that someone planted spy-cams everywhere to spy on me...because I'm so interesting << sarcasm.
I am pretty tired after my two excrutiating hours of masturdating.
Dipping out...